Confirmation

Today we had an interesting brown envelope in the post from our VA. It was an official invitation to join their next Adoption Preparation Course in March (in London). We knew unofficially that we'd been reserved a space but nothing quite prepares you for the letter and seeing it in black and white.

We also had the form to complete, which offially means we are prospective adopters and starting the ball rolling with the VA. Thankfully they are paying our travelling expenses and accommodation costs (which from Germany and with 5 nights accommodation in central London), is a Godsend.

I haven't really explained our reasons for adoption on my blog yet. To be honest I wasn't sure where to start! Maybe I should start from the beginning - but you are warned - it is a long one!!

I met DH over the internet in 1997. These were the days when the internet was starting to be accessible to ordinary households in the UK and the dangers of meeting strange met on the internet were not really well known!! Had they been and had I told my parents before I met him for the first time, what followed might never had happened!!!

We chatted online for the first two months or so. Both of us rushing home from work (him in England and me in Wales) and hogging the computer all night, chatting about everything and anything. We eventually met up in person in June 1997 and he travelled to my home city to see me and we explored the area together, taking in the sights and the shops.

The following week, one night after work, I drove down to his home to meet his family. About three weeks later he moved in with me and the rest is history! I was 24 and he was 30. That was almost 13 years ago.......

Our adoption route isn't one of prior heartache at failed IVF. I have been sad that we were unable to conceive (partly because of my medical condition) but we felt that IVF was not right for us, and decided to try adoption instead.

The Initial Visit

After putting our adoption journey on hold about 18 months ago, we finally felt ready to proceed with our quest to be a family. The initial initial visit had been so negative (not about us) that we needed time to think about exactly what sort of child(ren) were suitable for us.

Living overseas and going through a UK Voluntary Agency (VA) makes it a little different from the 'norm' and we were expecting a long day for our second 'initial' visit. The social worker (SW) flew out from the UK to spend a few hours with us. After collecting her from the hotel at 0915 in the morning, we spent the day chatting about ourselves, our hopes and dreams for the future and her talking about the children that were available for adoption.

SW was very well experienced and had reached a senior level in social work before her retirement and subsequent sessional worker status. She discussed a lot of the case histories she had worked on and their outcomes in great detail (obviously anonymous), and we had a real insight. It went so much better than the first initial visit, which made us totally doubt everything.

Eleven hours later we dropped her back at her hotel!!!! It was a long day and it was very mentally draining but we were now officially on the road to adoption and have been approved to go on the 4-day prep course in March. We can't wait!!

We know that it will be a really intense 4 days but we are very resilient and are eager to learn. We are hoping to eventually be approved for a sibling group of up to 3 children, aged either 0-5 or 0-7 years.

The home study (which will last up to 8 months) will commence after we have completed the prep course, and been allocated a new SW, who will see us through to the approval panel. One thing that both my husband (DH) and I need to do before then is to have some current childcare experience, so I am hoping to join the Rainbows (aged 5-7) as a helper and DH will enquire about helping at the local youth club (aged 8+).

I am hoping to update this blog as I have new information or news.

S

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