Confirmation

Today we had an interesting brown envelope in the post from our VA. It was an official invitation to join their next Adoption Preparation Course in March (in London). We knew unofficially that we'd been reserved a space but nothing quite prepares you for the letter and seeing it in black and white.

We also had the form to complete, which offially means we are prospective adopters and starting the ball rolling with the VA. Thankfully they are paying our travelling expenses and accommodation costs (which from Germany and with 5 nights accommodation in central London), is a Godsend.

I haven't really explained our reasons for adoption on my blog yet. To be honest I wasn't sure where to start! Maybe I should start from the beginning - but you are warned - it is a long one!!

I met DH over the internet in 1997. These were the days when the internet was starting to be accessible to ordinary households in the UK and the dangers of meeting strange met on the internet were not really well known!! Had they been and had I told my parents before I met him for the first time, what followed might never had happened!!!

We chatted online for the first two months or so. Both of us rushing home from work (him in England and me in Wales) and hogging the computer all night, chatting about everything and anything. We eventually met up in person in June 1997 and he travelled to my home city to see me and we explored the area together, taking in the sights and the shops.

The following week, one night after work, I drove down to his home to meet his family. About three weeks later he moved in with me and the rest is history! I was 24 and he was 30. That was almost 13 years ago.......

Our adoption route isn't one of prior heartache at failed IVF. I have been sad that we were unable to conceive (partly because of my medical condition) but we felt that IVF was not right for us, and decided to try adoption instead.

If you don't ask, you don't get!

Having posed the question in work as to whether I am entitled to special paid leave to go on my Adoption Prep Course, it was apparently new to those working in civil labour.

Normally, you get time off during placement but there is nothing written down in the employment manual for any sort of leave during the adoption process...... Those that are pregnant get time off for parentcraft classes or ante-natal classes but the adoptive parent is left out - a common trend I fear.....

Close friends and colleagues know about the adoption but I hadn't actually mentioned it to my line manager yet. So I thought I had better tell him, rather than let him hear from someone else. He told me he was pleased for us and would support me in any way he could.

Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised today when I got a letter from HR to say that my request for 5 days Special Paid Leave had been granted. Four days for the prep course and a day's travelling.

If you don't ask, you don't get!! If something isn't written down as being a definite no, then challenge it!